Cocaine?

Why am I broke? Yesterday’s expenses: dry cleaning, $45. Nexium for heartburn resulting from abuse of body, esophagus, stomach: $28. Medium pizza, half pepperoni: $17

The best part is when I got back my prescription I asked Sanjay, the pharmacy clerk:

Me: “$28? Jesus - is it cocaine?”
Sanjay: [checking prescription label] “No, it’s Nexium.”

Really? Because I seriously thought it was cocaine.

Jerkoff.