Songs In The Key Of Eh?

Long ago there was a song called "The Booty Up" and lo, it was good. This song sang about who can do the Booty Up and how you can do the Booty Up. It was melodic and it had a bit of a bump. It had the back beat from that song The Double-Dutch and it was witty, charming, ghetto and worthy of turning up. …And I cannot remember who the fuck sang it.

There’s a Saturday Night Live commercial on one of the networks here and in it they show clips of musical acts from the past year or so. In this montage they spent a bit of time on our favorite person named Marshall, Eminem. They stay on his performance long enough for him to get out the words “cum on your lips and some on your tits” from his ditty song Without Me. And I’m the only one who seems to have noticed.

I remember when I was living in the Phillipines, and I was asking my girl at the time (she was a local, they're easy, don't question it) if the song "Informer" by Snow ever made it over here. By title alone, the song was completely unfamiliar to her. Though when I sang the melody her jaw dropped open and she stared at me like I’d just shat a chocolate cat. Apparently everyone in that country thought that he was saying “Embalmer”. Yes, the entire country. I asked her if it ever occurred to her that none of the other lyrics support the song being about an “Embalmer” to which she replied an annoyed “No, Ameican music isn’t supposed to make any sense anyway.”

Following some time in Asia, I took leave to go back home (Mississippi at the time) and I found myself reorganizing my CDs and found a nugget of gold. In 1988 a go-go band in Washington D.C. recorded what is probably the most inspirational collection of measures and notes known to human kind. EU’s "Doing Da Butt" not only told of legendary doings of "Da Butt" but it also spoke of a new way of living.

“Ow! Sexy, sexy! There ain’t nothing wrong, if you want to do Da Butt all night long”

Again, no one in the Phillipines had a clue what the fuck I was talking about. These people didn’t know what they were missing and as the resident American I felt it my duty to force my way of thinking onto others.

Too bad "Doing Da Butt" was misinterpreted to sound like "Screwin My Butt".